Real Change - Real Coaching 

All of my work is based upon the belief that in order to create real and lasting change, there are four things that have to happen -- not three, not two, not one, but four. And they have to happen in this order. To bring about the change you want, we will follow this formula in this order.

1. Release negative emotions and limiting beliefs

2. Know your outcome

3. Take action

4. Maintain focus

There are plenty of good reasons why we follow this process. We’ve all known people in the past who have a lot of, say, anger, and they view life through a filter of anger. Any little thing, and they're angry about it. If you’ve ever made a decision when you were angry, you probably already know that usually doesn’t work out for the best. Same with sadness or fear. Making choices when we’re not feeling great is reactive and doesn’t lead us to the things we truly want, and those choices only keep us stuck where we don’t want to be. So we want to let go of all that negative stuff first.

Other people think they need to just start taking action right away so they get really busy, but they don’t have a clear sense of what it is they want. All that action keeps them busy all day, but it doesn’t move the needle that really matters. Before getting busy doing things, it’s best to know what it is we’re trying to accomplish. Know your outcome.

Then comes action and strategy, and, of course, staying the course even when obstacles present themselves. We ourselves are responsible for our own lives, and it’s up to us to create the changes we want to experience. That’s what we mean by maintaining focus.

Negative emotions like anger, sadness, fear, and guilt keep us from even imagining a perfect future. When we’re experiencing those feelings, we think an amazing future isn’t even possible because everything we see either pisses us off or makes us sad about what we don’t have or what we think we’ve lost. The thought of having a difficult conversation makes us afraid of how others will react. Or deep down we think there’s something about us that if others knew who we really are, they wouldn’t have anything to do with us and they’d leave. 

Limiting beliefs are thoughts or beliefs that constrain us and hold us back from reaching our full potential. These things might sound true and we don’t know it, but we’re actually lying to ourselves when we say, “I can’t,” “I don’t deserve,” “I’m not enough,” “I’m too old / I’m too young,” “I’m not smart”, “It’s too late”, “I can’t trust myself” -- and the list goes on.

We call all of those things baggage. We know we have baggage when we over-react and our response is out of proportion to whatever is really going on. Living with baggage is like looking through the wrong prescription eyeglasses. It’s a filter that distorts everything and keeps us repeating the same old patterns that haven’t worked in years. Before a breakthrough session, most people know a whole lot more about what they don’t want than what they do want.

The first step to creating real change is getting rid the baggage - all of the anger, sadness, fear, guilt, and limiting beliefs - all of it - during a breakthrough session. That’s not to say you’ll never experience negative emotions again. You will, of course, because you’re human and emotions are important to life itself. But in the future when you experience these emotions, they won't be loaded with years of build-up; they'll be appropriate and proportionate to the event at hand. 

Knowing your outcome is the second step. There’s no point in setting goals before a breakthrough session because you’d have been looking through a fog of negative emotions and self-imposed limiting beliefs. After a breakthrough session, you know what’s truly important to you, you know your purpose, why you’re here, and the outcomes you set will stem from you knowing who you’re meant to be. 

The next two steps are so much fun because these actually get you where you want to be. You’ll take action and maintain focus. Why these steps are important is because, for example, if we were working in the area of finance, you’d have let go of old emotions, old stories, old beliefs, and you’d be feeling pretty good. You’d have set your goals, your outcome. But you wouldn’t actually have financial freedom until you’ve adopted the plan that will get you where you want to be and taken action. Maintaining focus is you keeping your eye on the ball over the long-term.

To recap the four requisites for change, first there’s a breakthrough session where we get to the root cause of whatever was the matter in the first place, and we clear that out for good. Now you’re a clean slate and you’re thinking clearly so you set your outcome and take action to move toward your outcome because you are vigilant and stay the course.

The choice has always been yours. What I can promise you is that when you’re ready to make real change in your life, you will absolutely let go of the old baggage and be free from the past. I’m here to help you literally let go of old programming and install new beliefs and new habits. You decide your outcome, and I’ll help you to do that because you’ll have a clear understanding of your own values, what it is that’s important to you. Taking action is about strategy and having a clear understanding of how to get from where you are to where you want to be. Yes, obstacles will come up, and coaching will keep you centered and moving forward.

If you’re not really ready to make a commitment to yourself to create change, life will carry on the way it always has. Thinking of that one area of life that when it gets straightened out, everything else becomes so much easier, how would your life look five or ten years down the line if you don’t fix that problem now? Exactly. But when you are ready to create the changes you truly want, what I can promise you is you will let go of the baggage and be free of the past, you will be able to imagine that beautiful future, and you’ll have strategies in place to make it so. 

Donna Baker

Certified Trainer of NLP

Master Practitioner of NLP

Master Practitioner of Mental and Emotional Release®

Master Practitioner of Hypnotherapy

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